I have felt pretty good the last few years about finding my way financially through my weird, pieced together freelance/side hustling/stage manager life.

I’ve fairly well rocked it with savings, investing, setting up retirement accounts, and even figuring out Health Savings Accounts.

Funny story though, if you leave your weird little pieced together life, so many things seem to fall apart.

For instance, I am already currently a little frustrated at how spread out my investments are across a few brokerage firms and I wish I could figure out how to roll all my little 401(k)s into one.

And now, I just have to leave almost everything I’ve set up to just sit because I can’t use any of them with the new job.

I have to use their HSA, and they actually only have one health plan option that lets you have one.

I have to use their retirement plan.

I have to deep sigh over the whole thing.

To be fair, these are the epitome of first world problems. I just think if you spend a long time sorting out and fixing a confusing problem (like money when you don’t make a lot and don’t have traditional savings options available), you do still get to deep sigh when you have to change everything.

So that’s where we’re at – deep sigh week.

A good friend of mine pointed out to me when I was complaining about how I don’t like change that I actually have no problem with change – I have problems with stability.

He is totally correct.

I also should’ve expected more bumps from the establishment considering how totally not easy buying a house is.

It’s funny because I always used to wonder how older people get so stuck in their way of being and I assumed with my super weird life, that would never happen to me… but I’m totally used to the super weird way of doing everything and normalcy and stability just seem unnecessarily heavy to me.

It has been a weird week.

The weirdest moment was when I realized I really hope my last circus is headed back to the Middle East this summer and that I get the call for the gig. Who on earth would’ve ever thought I’d be looking forward to a possible few weeks in Saudi Arabia?

Not this girl, yet here we are. Life is an endlessly funny thing.