Slightly Better than Prostitution: Become an Adjunct Professor

So I have a confession to make – I have wanted to teach a college course as an adjunct for years, pretty much since I finished up my first Master’s degree in 2008. I keep hearing that it’s a particularly rough path and I have definitely applied for at least 500 adjunct jobs to no avail, but it really doesn’t help that I never TAed while I was in school. This is mainly because I would love to go on and get my PhD someday and although I’d be doing it like 80% because I just love studying theater theory and performance studies, that’s a lot of years and a lot of effort and I want it to have some kind of fiscal return, you know, like an awesome tenured professorship somewhere when I’m done wandering and working crazy hours for places like circuses and cruise ships. But I want to know for sure first that I would actually like teaching. So I was really excited when Dana contacted me to write this guest post about life as an adjunct. Then I read it. Sigh. 

 

Slightly Better than Prostitution: Become an Adjunct Professor

Slightly Better than Prostitution: Become an Adjunct Professor | brokeGIRLrich

I went to college because it seemed like something I should probably do. Reading and writing well is about the only real skill I have so I majored in English, got a Bachelor’s and went to work in insurance. Working 40 hours a week, having health insurance and contributing to a 401k also seemed like something I should probably do. Less than one year after I graduated, I found myself with a teeny baby and a dead brother. These life altering events so painfully close to one another reminded me that life is too short to care about doing all the stuff I think I should. Instead, I want to die doing what I want to do and I want my children to remember me negotiating life on my own terms. I went to grad school, applied for a teaching assistantship and upon graduating, just asked my boss if I could have some classes. That’s it. No formal job interview, minimal paperwork, very little training. Four years later I am still teaching College English part-time, and have since negotiated a position at two more institutions, only one of which I had to formally interview for. The other was the result of an email fishing for openings—isn’t that how all great jobs are born? Currently, I teach online for two colleges and teach a live course for another institution. Between all three, I teach approximately 7-13 classes per year. The age range of my students really runs the gamut—I have taught as young as 17 and as old as 73. That’s especially interesting when both the 17 year old and the 73 year old are in the same class.

If you are unemployed and have an aversion to health care benefits, a 401k and job security then the life of an adjunct professor is definitely the right career path. It is perfect for those who want to feel like they are important and part of an intellectual community without having the pressure of actually being considered either important or intellectual.  Anyone who has a Master’s degree and is interested in becoming a college instructor is encouraged to first exhaust the pipeline of similar industries including waiting tables and prostitution. After working in those two professions, adjuncting for any college will certainly feel like a step up. If you are currently working as a pharmaceutical sales rep or a member of a department store display team, then the opposite will be true. In those professions at least you get free dinners and discount merchandise instead of whiny students whose disdain for any kind of critical thinking is equal to your distaste for committee positions.  

It is possible that I am being slightly dramatic, but only a little. Besides the aforementioned pitfalls, there are actually some great perks to being an adjunct. We get to teach grown ups new skills and form great bonds with our most mature students–because they are grown ups and not 5-17year olds. We can simply say “FERPA” when a mom calls begging us to let her son hand in his essay two weeks after the due date. We can yell “fuck” in the middle of lecture and it really be no big deal, even when it doesn’t even make sense in the context of the discussion. Additionally, most of us have the unwavering support of our department chairs. It’s like having a boss that only cares that you are still breathing, able to talk—even that’s iffy—and not drawing too much attention to yourself.  They trust that you are not a total idiot and mostly give you free reign because you make no money and work your ass off. The least they can do is file your damn plagiarism case without hassling you too much.

The Pros and Cons of Becoming an Adjunct

 As far as my personal life is concerned, the two best advantages to teaching college part-time include the total lack of any real responsibility and the ability to pick and choose my schedule. When you need to pay the bills, have an education, but also have two small children who have silly little needs like food and shelter, and you have no money for daycare—only enough for groceries and your husband’s graduate school tuition—teaching writing is a nifty skill to have. When I can only teach at night, I teach at night. It also keeps me out of bars and the red light district. My kids are out of school in the summer and only the really coveted instructors are required to spend a miserable hot summer in a classroom.  Parents of young children are not at all coveted. It really works best for all parties involved.

So, if you just can’t wait to learn yet another institution’s educational software, love fielding tirelessly idiotic complaints and questions, have little patience for adolescents and barely a little more patience for supposed grown-ups, then really it is worth it to pursue a  teaching job within academia. You are constantly learning new ways to approach a subject you feel deeply passionate about and you get to be your own boss without having to actually be your own boss.

 Dana is a newly 30 mother of two girls who are prettier than anything she ever thought she could bake. When she’s am not cooking or raising kids, she pretends to teach freshman college students how to write. Recently, she moved amongst 100% strangers to Portland, OR and has discovered Whole Foods and Grocery Outlet. Blogging is the only hobby besides quitting smoking she’s stuck with longer than 6 months. You can read about sibling grief, amateur parenting, awkward Crossfit moments, and the all-too-honest recap of the stupid stuff she thinks about at aremypantstooloud.com.

*Part of Financially Savvy Saturdays on Femme Frugality and A Life in Balance*

17 thoughts on “Slightly Better than Prostitution: Become an Adjunct Professor

    • I agree. I’ve never thought it was easy, but everyone seems to think they can do it. Part of why I want to adjunct teach a class is to make sure it really is something I can do before putting all the work into a PhD. I’ve taught several classes as one-off lectures, but it doesn’t seem like it would be the same at all.

    • Yeah, I honestly don’t know how people survive with that as their full time job. One of my cousin’s is an adjunct at 4 different schools and his insurance only comes from the fact that he’s technically still a student, since he’s been putting off finishing his doctoral dissertation. He says he doesn’t even see the point now in completing it.

      I really only view it as a side hustle – I think lack of benefits is a key aspect to regulating something to the side hustle category. Self-employment not withstanding.

    • Agreed! At my last job we were doing an audition process for a group of performers and they were just being sold a pile of lies from the corporate representative. He told them all the perks and good things and left out stuff like their minuscule pay, incredibly long hours and mind-blowingly ridiculous PR schedule. Then he would hire a pack of them, they’d be angry as all heck in less than a month and half of them would break their contracts and quit. But if the Production Manager or I mentioned that maybe we should just tell them the truth, so they know what to expect… shut right down. Ugh.

  1. Very interesting to hear about your experience! I’ve been hearing more and more about the difficulties faced by adjunct professors, in particular, the lack of benefits, support and apparently, sometimes even lack of office space. The Atlantic often has articles on the topic and the most recent one I read was in Slate: http://www.slate.com/articles/life/education/2014/01/adjuncts_in_american_universities_u_s_news_should_penalize_colleges_for.html
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  2. My wife really wants to get her phd and tried to get into a few phd programs, but the acceptance rates were so low (under 5%) that she did not get in. She’s getting her masters now but still hopes to get a phd in clinical psych. She loves research so that’s her main motivation. I also really like research but the idea of public speaking/teaching for a living sounds terrible to me!
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    • I applied once years ago too and didn’t get in – it’s really tough and definitely an accomplishment in and of itself to even become a candidate. It’s just a shame that it’s so freaking difficult and time consuming to possibly amount to nothing – although I imagine areas like clinical psych have a wider array of applications than just lecturing. Theatre theory is considerably less so ;o)

  3. I adjuncted for one term after completing my PhD and transitioning to a full-time position… Man did I hate the pay for the amount of effort. Come to find out that I was making good money for an adjunct compared to other universities. It was just so hard to look at my colleagues who ended up with a LTA appointment (rather than PTA) and were making 2.5x more than me. (we’re talking from $27k per year to nearly 70k). Also, no benefits (aside from the mandetory 4% vacation pay).

    I was thankful I had the that experience because it looked good on my resume for future positions, and it taught me a lot,… but it’s just cheap labour. It’s a way to put in your dues (or test the waters in your case), not to make a living.

  4. I think adjuncting can be a nice enough side gig if you’re a working professional or retiree, which was the original intention of the idea. When I was in library school, for instance, I had an adjunct who was recently retired from his job as a cataloging librarian. But as a way to make a living, it sucks. I used to do it and by the time I graded all the papers, made like $10-$12 an hour and no benefits. I would say that it’s exploitative, except that by definition, everyone doing it has a master’s degree… so really, they should know better.
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    • Yeah, I really can’t imagine doing it as a career – more something on the side. Ideally, I’d love to teach a single class in theatre theory. It would give me a better idea also about whether or not going on for a PhD would be worth it.

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